Dimples

Yesterday Jace and I had a tender morning as he awoke and I climbed back into bed with him. He wondered why he felt so “crumby,” and we talked about the shots he received Monday. Our conversation drifted to how strong he is, and that if he decides in his mind that he is strong, he can be a good example to others. He asked me to retell his favorite story about when he was born. I try to tell the boys once a year (usually on their birthdays) about their birth, and how the events unfolded. Jace’s favorite part of HIS story is when I get to the first time I looked at him. I tell him, “I knew the minute I laid eyes on you, that you were incredible.”
He asks, “How did you know?”
I reply, “I knew in my heart.”
But yesterday I added one more part of how “I knew.” I added that I saw his dimples. It is the truth too. For some reason, I remember vividly that when I saw my newborn Jace’s dimples, I felt a flutter in my heart of pure love. I’ve since learned that dimples are actually a weak muscle in the face. Yesterday I thought of this knowledge, and I compared the weak muscle to his cancer. Although for some INSANE reason Jace’s body developed cancer, this weakness can turn into one of the strongest things he will ever defeat. I’m hoping someday I will look back and help him remember that weak things turned beautiful can be our most admired characteristics.

Today, I am waiting for his dimples to emerge. He’s sleeping peacefully now, and the prayer in my heart is that he can sleep as long as possible to lessen his “sick time” during another day- and when he awakes, I will probably climb into bed with him and tell him again how strong he is. He will also smile that cute smile, and his dimples will melt my heart all over again. Thank goodness for weak muscles.