Combat Gear

It’s been 10 days since I’ve written. If I had posted 8 days ago, the title of my post would have been “Striking Out.” If I had written 5 days ago- maybe “I Hate Chemo,” and after games on Saturday it would have been “Anxiety,” but this morning I’m going to sum it all up with the exclusive brand name, Combat Gear.

We bought the expensive protective shirt to cover Jace’s Port-a-Cath that is located on his left ribs. If you can picture him batting, the Port faces the pitcher…and in “KID PITCH” baseball, this is pretty daunting. The Combat Gear we bought is an amazing, high quality padded shirt designed to protect the person wearing it. The problem is, Jace is SO finicky about his clothing. Right before his first game last week, he felt the shirt was restricting his movement. He was hot, and the shirt was cumbersome and annoying. He begged to take it off. After having the “parent talk” with him about how he “might get hit, and if he does- it will really hurt,” but “it is his decision,” he lost no time in stripping off the Combat Gear and replacing his jersey without it. It was a tough call as a parent to watch him remove the gear. We have been told by our doctors that it won’t really do any damage to the Port if he does get hit there, as it is securely placed under the skin. The worst that can happen is it will just leave a bruise, causing extra pain.

Extra pain. Hmmm. We’ve about decided Jace doesn’t care about pain anymore. He again and again endures things that would make grown men cry. So, I guess when Matt and I say “extra pain,” Jace shrugs his shoulders and says, “Big deal.” I’m just really wishing there was such an invention as Combat Gear for a mother’s heart.

Like I hinted, after four official games Jace’s batting record is less than desirable, and his chemo treatment last Tuesday knocked him down worse than we planned. By Thursday morning he was nearly as sick as he was in the heart of his frequent treatments. Saturday we wondered how he would play in his baseball games at all, but like the trooper he is, he showed up, gave his best, and collapsed at the end of the day. Matt carried him to bed.

My awesome friend, Melissa gave a talk in church Sunday. She gave an analogy that I loved using baseball. She said that while watching our sons’ games Saturday she noticed again and again the coach coax the runner off the base for a lead. While the opposing pitcher had the ball, the coach would yell to the runner, “More, more! I got you.” This meant, you can lead off more than you are! I will protect you- should the pitcher try to pick you off…and if the pitcher turned to throw, the coach would yell, “BACK!” This is often very uncomfortable for our boys, because the base is so much safer for them than half-way up the baseline. Melissa likened this to giving MORE in life. It is often uncomfortable to improve (advance), but very rewarding in the end. In other words, we can’t be scared! Our Heavenly Father will protect us if we just listen to Him- and just like the coach, He does NOT want us to get “OUT.”

(Hayden looking to steal 3rd)

So this week our family is working through what monthly chemo treatments will be like for Jace. Every time someone (who doesn’t read the blog) asks if he’s finished with chemotherapy, they are surprised when we say he will have monthly treatments for 2 ½ more years. In fact, the other day in a store, the clerk was helping me find something. Jace was walking next to me, and his legs were getting tired. He lifted his arms up to tell me he needed carried. I automatically picked him up. The clerk looked at me in surprise and said outloud, “I’m sorry, but he is too old for you to carry!” I just smiled and thought to myself, if she only knew. We also left the store…before she wished she had Combat Gear. :)